Draw Nearer
by Siduri
Summary: Since Zuko X Jin stories are so difficult to find, here's my take. For people with such a complex past, their lives have been going exceedingly well. So, of course, it's time for the past to catch up with them.
1. Chapter 1: Odi et Amo

Chapter 1: _Odi et Amo_

So they have finally come for him, Jin thought, literally dropping the chickenpig as she began to run towards the house. Happy to be released from its mistress' arms, the animal scampered off into the underbrush, following the rest of the flock. Jin was too wrapped up in the worry that had suddenly take hold of her to notice the escape. The house was little more than a cabin, and usually looked like a typical Earth Kingdom farmhouse – but what ordinary Earth Kingdom house was graced by a group of grumpy komodo rhinos tied to the porch railing? The rhinos were decked in the red and black livery of the Fire Nation, causing Jin to grimace, though she was not entirely surprised. It was a bit unexpected, perhaps, that they had come so soon - who would have thought to look for him here, in this rural backwater? It was inevitable, though, that it would happen eventually. I knew this day would come, she told herself.

Her first instinct was to rush in, to throw open the door and tell them to leave her husband alone. He didn't belong to them now. She wasn't that stupid, though. Instead, she slowed her steps, smoothed her braids, and then tucked her hands into the sleeves of her green robe. She walked purposefully towards the door, trying not to let the rhinos see how nervous she was in their presence.

It wasn't like she didn't know that he was from the fire nation. It was obvious, after all. She should have figured it out on that first date. They had gone to see the firelight fountain, but all the lamps were out. He had asked her to close her eyes, and when she had opened them, the lamps were all lit. No one could have done that but a firebender. Of course, Jin didn't make that connection at the time. She might have, if he and his uncle hadn't disappeared a few days later and if, mere days after their disappearance, the Earth Kingdom had not fallen to the Fire Nation, the great walls of Ba Sing Sei brought low for the first time in history. And she would have known had she listened to the rumours, the ones that the regulars at the tea house told, about how the old man would sometimes warm the tea without flint or kindling or any source of fire beyond his own hands.

She finally pushed her way past the last of the rhinos to the door, and was on the verge of opening it when she heard a voice from inside.

"No, you don't get it," her husband was explaining to someone, "The Earth Kingdom ceremony, it isn't like that."

A stranger's voice replied, "So you're married but . . . not married?"

"Exactly," her husband said.

Jin stood there on the porch, her hand mere centimetres away from the rough wooden door. Married but not married? How could that be? Why was her husband even talking about such things with these Fire Nation soldiers, rather than ordering them from his home? This was his life now, here with her, not off somewhere with the Fire Nation army he had somehow escaped. Jin had half a mind to go in and tell him off, but then he spoke again. The tone of his voice was irritated and weary, the tone that typified Jin's husband in so many ways, the tone she loved and hated at the same time.

"If I had known that I was going to go home again," her husband said, "then I would never have gone through with that stupid Earth Kingdom wedding ceremony."

As Jin's world crashed down around her, her only thought was 'I hate you, Zuko'.

**Note to the reader: **_The Latin in the Chapter title translates to "I hate and I love". The phrase is famously used as the opening to a poem _(Carmina LXXXV) _ by the Ancient Roman poet Catullus._

_Please look forward to Chapter 2; comments and suggestions are welcome. _


	2. Chapter 2: Wherein we Encounter Iroh

Chapter 2: Wherein we Encounter _Iroh_, who converses with our _Heroine_

When Iroh came upon Jin, she was standing under a tree looking angry. No, he mentally corrected, angry was too soft and gentle a word. Baleful, perhaps, or murderous. He sighed; it wasn't as though he expected her to be happy, under the circumstances, but just the same, his nephew couldn't be doing well if Jin looked that unhappy. He walked up to her, placing a hand on her shoulder. The young woman looked surprised.

"I didn't know you were here," she said, her voice unexpectedly calm, "I thought you were in the city, trying to set up another shop."

He shrugged, "I thought I should come. You look like you could use a cup of tea."

Jin seemed to consider the suggestion, but then tossed her head.

"No," she replied, "I'm not going back to that house. I can't believe that he … that he _betrayed _me like that!"

Iroh raised an eyebrow, "I am not sure what you think my nephew did, but he is very fond of you."

"Him? Fond of me?" She laughed bitterly. "He couldn't care less. He's planning to leave, after all – he'd have thrown those Fire Nation soldiers out if he didn't! I should have known not to trust him. He even told them that he'd never have married me, if he knew he'd be going home again!"

"I'm sure he didn't mean – " Iroh began, only to be cut off.

"Oh, he meant it. He was even trying to tell them we weren't really married. Well, that we were and weren't, whatever that means. And then he said he'd never have gone through with the wedding ceremony if he knew he'd be going home."

Iroh relaxed slightly. Zuko had said something stupid without thinking, and the girl had misunderstood, of course. That must be what had happened. His nephew was a good person at heart, after all, Iroh believed that firmly. So surely whatever idiotic thing Zuko had said, he didn't mean it, at least, he didn't mean it as the girl had interpreted it. Iroh sighed and sat down among the tall grass at the foot of the tree.

"I doubt that he dislikes you; he only meant that in the Fire Nation there are certain protocols and formal documents and very specific rules which wedding ceremonies generally follow. And of course, things must be done properly, if one of the people involved may someday be Fire Lord. Why, when I got married – "

Noticing the condition of his audience, Iroh stopped talking. Jin's eyes were wide, and her face pale.

"Are you alright?" He asked, concerned, "What is the matter?"

"He lied to me. He straight out lied," She said.

Though, to be honest with herself, perhaps he hadn't lied, at least not directly. She had let him get away without really saying anything on the matter at all.

She tried to explain herself in a way that made sense, "I asked him. When we were first married, when I told him I _knew_ Li wasn't his real name, I asked him. I had heard you call him 'Zuko,' you know. And he does have that scar . . ."

Jin could remember the conversation vividly. How she had glared at him, and told him she knew very well exactly where he was from, and she even knew his name. He had become angry, of course, but she had gone on, wanting him to admit he was from the Fire Nation, so she could forgive him and tell him she adored him anyhow. When she finally said his name, he had grimaced, his expression the closest thing to fear she had ever seen appear on his face, before or since.

She continued, "I said to him, 'At least you aren't _that_ Zuko. I would have to hate him.' And he just shrugged. He didn't say, 'I'm him,' or anything like that. He let me believe what I wanted."

"Did you really expect otherwise?" Iroh asked cautiously, surprised that the girl had allowed herself to believe in spite of all the evidence to the contrary.

"I don't now that I know better. I was a fool, a stupid fool," she said bitterly.

The old man smiled a little.

"You were not that stupid," He said, "Naïve, maybe, but not stupid. After all, you play Pai Sho. And were you not the girl who bragged to me that she had once been accepted to study at the great university at Ba Sing Sei? You can't be stupid if you were planning to attend a fine school like that."

"That doesn't mean anything. It's his fault I never actually went to the university; I never could go, because of the attack on the city. And like an idiot, I believed what he wanted me to believe." She sighed pensively, "I really was stupid."

Iroh stood up, and placed his hand on the young woman's shoulder. She didn't shrug it off, which he took as a good sign.

"Go and speak with him," Iroh suggested, moving his hand down to her elbow. He gently pushed her towards the house.

"No," she said, going stiff, "I won't. I never want to talk to him again."

Iroh continued to guide her, and Jin could not help taking a few steps towards the house.

"You will regret it if you do not," Iroh pointed out, almost off-hand, "Especially if you do not see him for a long time."

"I will not regret it! He's a jerk."

"I meant," Iroh continued forcing her to walk, his voice still calm, almost relaxed, "That you might regret having not yelled at him." Jin stared at Iroh, who grinned as he pushed her up the steps. She very nearly smiled back.

"I do want to give him a piece of my mind," she admitted.

"Good. Do that, then," Iroh said, reasoning that any sort of talk between them was better than nothing. He was about to bundle her through the door, but he paused.

"Iroh," he said.

"I'm sorry?" Jin looked confused.

"My real name. Just in case you didn't know that, either." He grinned broadly again, and pushed her in through the open door.

It was only as the door shut behind her that Jin realised something. The kindly older man that she thought of almost as her own uncle was the same man who had laid siege to the city when she was a child.

**Note to the Reader:**_Of course this chapter title doesn't come from anywhere. It is, however, strongly influenced (strange orthography and all) by old fashioned chapter titling practices, such as you might see in the work of Charles Dickens. What can I say, chapter titles please me. _


	3. Chapter 3: The Heat and Flame of

Chapter 3: The Heat and Flame of Thy Distemper

Zuko stood at the far end of the room, waiting. He heard Jin snipe at the soldiers in the other room, telling them she had a right to go in, and he sighed. He already knew this wasn't going to go well. He turned to face the door just as it opened.

Jin's intention had been to start off composed and calm, but when she saw him her goals were almost immediately forgotten. He was dressed like the men in the hallway, or the stupid rhinos outside the door. Red and black, how she hated red and black! She was pleased, however, to see that his hair was too short to wear up in the Fire Nation fashion. She was glad she had told him to cut it. It served him right, that one small aspect of this appearance didn't match the ideal he was trying to emulate.

"Just what's going on here?" she asked as she shut the door, giving them some modicum of privacy, though she was sure their voices still carried through the walls.

"It's complicated," Zuko said.

Jin grimaced. That was a favourite phrase of his. It was not a favourite of hers.

"Complicated?" She retorted, "You lied to me."

"I didn't lie," He reflected that she sounded angry, but not quite as angry as he imagined she would. Maybe he would be able to manage this.

"Yes, yes you did. A lie of omission is still a lie. Just because you decided not to answer a question – "

Zuko cut her off before she could go any further, "A stupid question. It shouldn't have been that hard to figure out. I thought you were smarter than that."

Jin glared at him. It was one thing for her to call herself stupid; it was something different again for him to imply that he thought she was.

"Maybe I thought I could trust you – maybe I thought you couldn't be that Zuko, because he was terrible and you weren't – at least, I thought you weren't," she said, and turned away.

Zuko did not know what to say. He had never done anything that he didn't think was right or at least justifiable at the time, but he knew Jin probably saw it differently.

"I don't want to discuss it," he said grumpily, before continuing on to a matter which he knew might prove even more troublesome, "I'm going home."

Jin didn't react. She didn't even turn to face him.

"Look, the least you could do is be happy for me!" He complained, "I can go home – I'm not entirely sure why, something to do with my father being ill, but I can go home! And," he laid his hand on her shoulder, his voice hopeful, "Maybe, after a while, I could send for you."

Now, finally, Jin turned and glared at him, her green eyes boring into his amber ones.

"No," she said simply.

"What do you mean, no?" Zuko demanded, growing angry, "Don't you know what I'm offering you?"

"What you're offering me? You're offering me the chance to maybe - not for certain, mind you, but maybe - go off with you to the home of my enemies? The enemies of just about everyone with any sense of decency? After you lied to me? I mean, did you notice you're the_prince_ of the Fire Nation?!"

"So? I always was. And if you had paid attention instead of living in some stupid dream, you'd have known it all along!"

"I was not living in a dream! You let me believe it! I didn't think you even wanted to go back to that stupid place. I thought that you wanted to stay here, in hiding. And all along you were plotting to go back, so you could be the Fire Lord? I wouldn't go anywhere with a jerk like you!"

"Even you have to admit I wasn't always a jerk! Sure, I'm the Zuko who's Prince of the Fire Nation, but I'm also the Zuko who helped the Avatar, aren't I? The one who helped him learn firebending and then went against my own father?"

Zuko almost had her with that. After all, that part was true, so far as she knew. The same prince of the Fire Nation who had first tried to capture the Avatar had later tried to help him, or so the rumours said. But he couldn't have been too much help, could he? Because although the Avatar hadn't failed, he hadn't completely succeeded either – the Fire Lord was still alive, after all, and large portions of the Earth Kingdom were still occupied by Fire Nation troops. Nevertheless, Jin was tempted to give into him, or at least listen to him. But Zuko ruined the moment.

"So once I've managed to work it all out, you're coming," He insisted, harshly grabbing Jin's arm, his grip uncomfortably tight, "And I don't want to hear any more of your silly complaints. Not with what I'm giving you."

Jin's temper flared, "You aren't giving me anything! You don't even know if I'd be able to come, and even if I was able to, I wouldn't do it," she said, shaking free, "I hate you!"

"Fine!" He sounded as angry as she did, "I hate you too!"

"Fine!" She repeated back to him, adding, "And I'm not coming, no matter what you say so you can just go!"

"Maybe I will!" Zuko retorted.

"So go," Jin replied, "And see if I care!"

And with that, she stomped out of the room, back past the Fire Nation soldiers, and out towards the garden. In the end, it had gone even more badly than Zuko had anticipated. He wished he had been the one to stomp out, at least.

**A Note to the Reader**: _And this chapter title is a line from Hamlet. It's a teeny bit of one of Gertrude's statements to Hamlet after Polonius is killed. Thinking Hamlet mad, she says to him (among other things) "_Upon the heat and flame of thy distemper / Sprinkle cool patience." _I thought the heat and flame part was somewhat appropriate._

_And yes, I know that all my little plans will probably be destoryed by canon sooner rather than later. The best laid plans of mice and men, as Burns says. Sigh. _


	4. Chapter 4: In the Hall of the Fire Lord

Chapter Four: In the Hall of the Fire Lord

Zuko stood in the portrait gallery; his hands clasped behind his back, and sighed. There, before him, were the pictures of his ancestors, Fire Lord after Fire Lord, good rulers, bad ones, men about whom Zuko had been taught all his life, and others about whom Zuko knew nearly nothing. Everyone expected that his picture would hang here among them, and frankly, this expectation left Zuko a little surprised.

It was true, of course, that he was the eldest child and only son of the Fire Lord, but Father had always liked Azula better. Zuko's younger sister was talented and confident, ruthless and, truth be told, more than a little cruel. Her personality was more like their father's, and she was definitely his favourite child. Zuko hadn't exactly been in Father's good graces lately, either. Actually, Zuko had never exactly been in his father's good graces. The fact that he was still the heir apparent, after all this time, was astonishing. Apparently Zuko's father was now ill, and had been for some time. Zuko suspected the illness had started when his father had faced the avatar, at the end of the summer almost two years ago now. Whatever had caused the sickness, if Zuko's father died, Zuko himself was next in line for the throne. And that was an interesting thought. It was a position he had long assumed he'd fill, but one about which his feelings were mixed, to say the least.

Zuko walked up and down the room, pretending to admire the portraits. If he wasn't Fire Lord, who would be? There was Azula, but that couldn't possibly be good for the country. Not for the ordinary citizens, anyhow. There was also Uncle Iroh, who had once been the acknowledge heir to the Fire Nation himself. But Zuko had the feeling that Uncle Iroh had no interest in being Fire Lord; he had been much happier as a mild-mannered, Pai Sho-mad eccentric running a tea shop than he ever had as a general or statesman. Zuko didn't doubt that Uncle Iroh could be a good Fire Lord, maybe even a great one – but Zuko also didn't doubt that Uncle Iroh would rather not have to be. So that left only Zuko himself.

And once upon a time, of course, Zuko had been sure he wanted to fill the role, too. It was his destiny. Ever since his father had inherited the position instead of Uncle Iroh, it was a given that Zuko was next in line. And Zuko had known, even as a boy, that it would be dishonourable to turn down such a position. But now that it seemed it might become reality, Zuko felt surprisingly unhappy about the whole affair. He had all the usual worries, of course – that he would not do well in the position, that he would have trouble with rebellious factions within his own government, that his life would no longer be his own – but there were other worries, ones he had never thought might even come up in his life. He was worried about ending the war. He didn't want the Avatar as his enemy. But ending the war would mean making peace with the Earth Kingdom, possibly turning large amounts of territory back over to the Earth King, and Zuko knew his father's government would not like that. He was also worried about a young woman who had glared at him the last time he had seen her, who unfortunately was an ordinary Earth Kingdom citizen, rather than the daughter of a Fire Nation official. The fact was, he was married to her, and that was another thing his father's government would not like. It was something they would not like at all.

**A Note to the Reader**: _A musical reference this time, the title is paraphrased from _In the Hall of the Mountain King,_ from Grieg's _Peer Gynt_ suite. You probably know the piece of music, but you may not realize that you know it – Google "In the Hall of the Mountain King" if you're not sure. Go on, do it. You know you want to._

_On an aside, not really happy with this one. I wanted to get away from everything resembling dialogue, but it didn't come out as well as I had hoped. Oh well, onwards and forwards. At least I got to use the word "dishonourable". It's a good word._


	5. Chapter 5: I Dote On His Very Absence

Chapter Five: I Dote On His Very Absence!

Jin sat, head in hands, staring out the window. She looked out on the front of the house, but she didn't really take any of it in. She did not notice the nausea that seemed to have invaded her life since he left, probably due to her anxiety and worry. She did not notice the small cloud of dust as someone rode an animal far in the distance on the dry land. She did not notice anything outside of her thoughts. Zuko had been gone nearly a month, and except for one sheet of paper with the single line 'I have arrived safely,' she had heard nothing from him. Jin wondered if he had meant to send even that little note. She decided cynically that his uncle had probably put him up to it.

Enough time had passed that Jin could be honest with herself now. At first she had been so angry that she thought that seeing him ever again would be a fate worse than death, but now, she missed him. She missed him terribly. She didn't forgive him, exactly, but if walked in the door right now, she would pretend that nothing had ever happened. But of course, he wasn't going to walk through the door, now would he? Where he was he had power, and family, and he was a big jerk anyhow. Oh, she was sure he was a big jerk. She wondered, though, how it was that she hadn't seen that before. She had seen him as slightly unsure of himself, though far from shy, basically kind, if brusque, and as surprisingly honourable. In her experience, none of those things usually added up to lying jerk. The closest thing to lying jerk she could think of was when he told her he was in a circus, and really, that was just a different side of this same deception.

She supposed she still wanted him back, as well. She knew she wanted him back because she was still here, in this place they had called home. She wondered what it was she missed about him. Perhaps it was just the fact that there was always a fire going if she needed one, except, what she missed was _him_, not what he could do. If she didn't half hope he would return, or write, she would have left. She would have gone back to Ba Sing Sei – it would be easy enough, since all the countryside in-between was occupied by the Fire Nation, so there was no frontier to cross – and tried to discover what had become of the family and friends she had once had in the city. And even if that didn't work out, there were plenty of opportunities to find a job, and the university was bound to re-open eventually. Going to the city would be very sensible.

Lost in her reverie, Jin almost missed the commotion outside the window. She lifted her head with a start when she finally noticed a strange, pronged shadow fall across the windowsill. After a moment, she worked out that it was the shadow of a Fire Nation helmet. For an instant, her heart leapt, but she looked up to see a stranger's face, as she realized she should have expected. Knowing the Fire Nation, he was here to commandeer supplies. He would scout out what she had, and send his squad later to take what they needed.

"Excuse me?" The soldier was no older than she herself was, and his voice was remarkably polite, "Are you . . . that is to say, is your name Jin, miss?"

Jin blinked at him, her voice uncertain as she said, "Yes."

"Oh good, I thought I'd never find this place. I have this for you," He set down a letter on the windowsill, "And I am to stay right here until I am sure you've read it, and I have your answer, one way or the other."

Jin turned the letter over in her hand, snorting at the numerous official seals and stamps, red and black in and red wax, little tri-pointed flame symbols worked into most of the symbols.

It was from him, she realised. Who else would write to her from the Fire Nation, and in such an official manner? She was about to tear into the letter, excited to finally be hearing from him, when the Fire Nation soldier sighed impatiently. That one little sound brought Jin back to reality. What if the letter wasn't about good things? What if he was saying he never wanted to see her again, that she wasn't good enough for him, now? She was mad at Zuko, really and truly mad, and he hadn't even come home. He'd only sent some stupid letter, and all decked out in Fire Nation symbols, too. And after he'd yelled at her when he left. He had no right to be mad at her! She was the one who had the right to be angry; she was the one who had been lied to in the worst manner possible! And then, when she finally found out about the lie, Zuko had the nerve to _leave_?

"I'm not opening this," She frowned as she realised that the uneasiness in her stomach had grown worse. The young soldier stared at her.

"But you have to open it!" He complained.

Jin shrugged, "Why? I'm glad he's gone. Overjoyed even. I don't want to hear from him! I might read it for fun, I think, eventually . . ." Looking a little green, she ended, "I think I might throw up."

**A Note to the Reader:** _Shakespeare again, but _Merchant of Venice_ this time. _

_And yes, that is a rather large cliché you see lumbering on the horizon. I make no apologies. Yet._


	6. Chapter 6: Journeys End in

Chapter Six: Journeys End in Lovers' Meetings.

Zuko stared at the fire that separated the Fire Lord's throne from his audience chamber. Three whole weeks, and he still hadn't figured out if there was some sort of automatic control, whereby he could just set the flames in the middle to burn low enough to be seen over easily, without directly having to firebend them. He walked around to the audience chamber side of the flames, then stood for a long while, looking at the fire leap and dance. He was surprised to suddenly feel a cool hand resting on his arm. He looked up to see a pale girl with dark hair regarding him solemnly. Mai, he realised. A young woman he liked, with whom he had a complex relationship, and who had no idea he had a wife.

"I heard you had come home," she said.

"I thought you were still in New Ozai," Zuko responded.

"I came when I found out you had become Fire Lord. I was sorry to hear about your father."

Zuko shrugged, not replying. He saw no reason to explain his own feelings. It had all happened so quickly, even more quickly than he remembered from when his grandfather died, and he did not want to have to admit that he basically didn't know what he was doing. Thank goodness Uncle Iroh hadn't made good on his threat to go off to start a new tea shop in Ba Sing Sei.

Mai smiled up at Zuko. It was a rare expression for her, and she was surprisingly pretty when she smiled. It was strange, to remember how close they had been, not so long ago.

"It must be nice to have so much power all of a sudden," She said.

"It isn't as great as it seems." Zuko replied, "I have a lot to worry about."

"The war?" Mai asked, tilting her head to one side.

"The war," he agreed. He did not elaborate. He did not mention the fact that his plan was to end the war, as soon as possible, but somehow to do so with honour and minimal loss of face. He also did not mention that he wasn't entirely sure how to go about doing this, yet.

Mai slipped her arm into Zuko's proprietarily. Zuko stiffened slightly, though Mai seemed not to notice. If Jin saw this . . . but then, Jin was far away. And he had been looking into various legal documents, and he suspected that the few people who had heard about the marriage might be right. It might not, in fact, be legally binding here. And if it wasn't legally binding, then he perhaps wasn't married at all.

Zuko allowed Mai to lead him away from the flames, in between the great dark columns that held up the distant ceiling. She was smiling at him again, he noticed. The smile made him melancholy. It would be easy, very easy, to let her lead him off, to forget about the recent past and go back to the way things had been. And Mai would make a good wife for a Fire Lord. She was clever and serious and, if not ruthless like Azula, strong and brave. Still, there was Jin. Jin was clever too, and outgoing, and kind. And, he asked himself, if he didn't want to have Jin back, then why had he written that letter, asking – no, demanding – that she come?

Regretfully, Zuko shook his arm free of Mai's. Mai looked up at him, her eyes questioning. He shrugged.

"It's a long story," He said, by way of explanation.

Mai considered this, "Did Azula threaten to make fun of you again?"

"No," he made a face, "Well, yes, but that isn't why . . . oh, just leave me alone, okay?"

Mai stared at Zuko, then shrugged, as if she didn't care. And he calls me cranky, she thought. He'll get over it, whatever it is. Eventually. Wordlessly, she turned and left the room.

For a moment Zuko stood, watching the door Mai had just walked out of. I'm an idiot, he thought to himself, a total idiot.

**A Note to the Reader**: _To my immense shock, the chapter title is from Shakespeare again. The interesting thing is, I had no idea that this quotation was actually from Shakespeare! Turns out it's from _Twelfth Night;_ go figure. I liked the quotation as a title for this chapter because it's slightly misleading, at least, I think so._

_Also, my apologies if I've accidentally left in any misspellings of Mai's name. Unfortunately, the pronunciation and spelling of her name don't match at all in my subconscious notions of orthography. I hope I caught all the errors._


	7. Chapter 7: See How the Fates Their Gifts

Chapter 7 See How the Fates Their Gifts Allot

Damn them all, Jin thought. The whole stupid Fire Nation. They were supposed to be a bunch of evil, heartless murderers, but they had been bright enough to send as messenger a soldier who was actually an okay guy. Sure, he had given her a disgusted look when she said she might throw up, but he had gotten over it quickly. And then, to her surprise, he had started rummaging through her cupboards.

"What are you doing?" Jin had asked anxiously. Leave it to the Fire Nation to go through someone's things without asking.

"Looking for something for your upset stomach," he had said helpfully, adding after a moment, "You sure have a lot of kinds of tea. You must really like the stuff."

Jin had rolled her eyes, pointing out, "_I_ didn't buy it."

And it was true, too, she hadn't bought any of it. It had all been brought by that uncle of Zuko's . . . Jin wondered what the older man was doing now. Probably helping his nephew, which was a pity. Iroh really _should_ have gone and started another tea shop. It was probably better than helping Zuko, anyhow.

The young soldier had finally fished something out of the cupboard triumphantly. He had then lit a fire with a gesture less vigorous than Jin used brushing her hair, and a few minutes later pushed a mug of sharp-smelling liquid into Jin's hands.

"Ginger tea," he had explained, "You had it in the cupboard."

And now, no more than ten minutes and a cup and a half of tea later, Jin had to admit she was feeling much better. Well, that is to say, her stomach felt much better. She was, if anything, angrier than before. How was she supposed to tell off this young Fire Nation soldier now, after he had been so helpful? She couldn't do it – especially since the tea wasn't half bad. And she so wanted to tell him off. It had been clever of his superiors to send a sweet, helpful person like him instead of the usual Fire Nation jerks.

"So," the young man said pleasantly as Jin scowled into her tea, "Are you going to open the letter?"

Jin gave him a dirty look, responding, "I already said I wasn't opening it."

The soldier frowned, "But I can't leave until you read it. You don't want me to get in trouble after I made you the tea, do you?"

Jin sighed loudly. Stupid Fire Nation. She paused for a moment, looking at the myriad official seals on the letter, and then tore through them, opening it. She unfurled it carefully, trying not to smile at the familiar handwriting. At least he wrote it himself, she thought. The soldier watched as Jin read the letter, unable to keep from smiling when she gasped. Finally, Jin set the letter down. She glared at the young man.

"So, you're going to pack your things and come to the capital, right?" He smiled blandly.

"I – " Jin frowned. "I don't know."

"But it's a direct order from the Fire Lord. You can't say no."

"I can too," she responded childishly. After all, it wasn't like he could just order her around, no matter what country he was suddenly in charge of! Except, she reflected as she looked at the young soldier, that wasn't entirely true. This might, strictly speaking, be the Earth Kingdom, but this area was occupied by the Fire Nation, and their soldiers were everywhere. And if Zuko really was Fire Lord – and it certainly seemed that he was – then he controlled that army. And the army controlled the occupied territory, and the people in it, and therefore, Jin. In some perverse way, Zuko could order her around, whether she liked it or not. And she did _not_ like it.

"I'm not riding one of those rhinos, though," she said rudely.

"I've been authorized to get you an ostrich horse instead," the young soldier said pleasantly.

Damn that Fire Nation for thinking of everything, Jin thought, damn that _Zuko_ for thinking of everything.

"You'd better not steal it," she said curtly, "I know the Fire Nation and how they 'borrow' things from the local farmers."

The soldier rolled his eyes, "Contrary to popular belief, the Fire Nation _does_ provide its army with a budget. We'll buy it."

"Fine," Jin sighed. The young soldier looked satisfied.

Jin sipped the last of her tea pensively. I can't believe I'm actually going to go. I do want to see him again, but not like that, not as Fire Lord. I want things to be the way they were. But those days, it seemed, were over. Draining the cup, Jin went to pack her things.

**A Note to the Reader**: _In an attempt to avoid all things Shakespeare, I stole this chapter's title from Gilbert and Sullivan's _Mikado._ The phrase is the title/first line of a song in the second act. It is an okay song, but not the best in the operetta. Be warned, I'm a bit of a G & S fan, so don't be surprised if their work pops up again._

_In the first line, you see the reason I have not dropped this thing down to a straight "K" rating. To be honest, I was quite proud of myself for keeping things reasonably civil back in Chapter 3. I honestly thought I'd end up having to rate it "T". Things might still go that way if I can't restrain myself, but so far so good._

_And yes, ginger really is good for an upset stomach. Why else do parents give kids ginger ale when they have the stomach flu? My parents did when I was small, at least. And it worked, too. It has to be good ginger ale, though, the kind with real ginger in it._

_Also, a warm thank you to everyone for their kind comments! You make me feel warm and fuzzy! Hurray!_


	8. Chapter 8, Which Involves a Red Dress

Chapter 8, Which Includes a Red Dress

Jin held up the dress and sighed. She had to admit it was pretty. It might even look alright on her, though she wasn't entirely sure. The dress was red, after all. Not a bad red, a nice red, like the coals of a campfire warming the dark, but still red. Jin was really angry at the servant – or courtier, or retainer, or whatever the right term was – for insisting she wear it. Well, and the suggestion that her favourite dress be thrown out, based on the obviously ridiculous statement that 'no one wears green'. So far the Fire Nation had been a bit of a disappointment.

For one thing, Jin had expected the Fire Nation to be much scarier. She had expected the place to be bleak, industrial, and frightening. And it wasn't. Instead, the Fire Nation was, well, sort of ordinary. That wasn't to say that it was the same as the Earth Kingdom, of course. You only had to look at the children in their military-inspired school uniforms to see that. Still, the markets sold the same fruits and vegetables she was used to from the Earth Kingdom, the buildings were roofed with reassuringly solid clay tiles, and the little towns and villages they had passed en route to the capital had seemed prosperous and reasonably happy.

The capital itself was impressive. It lacked the great walls and sprawling, seemingly endless neighbourhoods of Ba Sing Sei, but to Jin's surprise, what the Fire Nation capital lacked in size it made up for in grace. The palace itself was at once terrible, dark, and frightening, and dizzyingly delicate, tall, and beautiful. The interior was overwhelming, yes, but the gardens, from what little she had seen, were wonderful. It seemed like the palace of the Fire Lord was as contradictory and strange as the Fire Nation itself.

When she arrived Jin had expected to see Zuko right away, at once, perhaps, but she had arrived more than an hour ago, and she had heard no word of him. Perhaps, if she put the red dress on, and thus looked like an ordinary Fire Nation citizen, they would take her to him, or bring him to her. Jin shook the dress out and laid it on the bed, looking at it again. It wasn't that bad, she told herself. It was only a dress, after all, and she'd never owned anything red before.

In another part of the palace Azula, younger sister of the Fire Lord, smiled to herself. Something interesting was going on, and she intended to find out what that something was. Her brother had been acting strangely the past few days – well, more strangely than usual, he _was_ always strange, after all. Then, today, a little military convoy had arrived unexpectedly, from the Earth Kingdom. It didn't take a genius to figure out that perhaps the two things, her brother's odd behaviour, and this sudden arrival, were related. Of particular interest to Azula was the Earth Kingdom citizen who had accompanied the convoy. A young woman, according to the servants, and one who wasn't treated as a prisoner, but was accorded some respect. I wonder what Zuko has been hiding, Azula thought to herself. It was possible that he was hiding something compromising. He had lived in the Earth Kingdom for a long while, after all. And, in Azula's opinion, Zuko's judgment had never been the best. Whatever he had gotten himself into, it was sure to be terribly interesting, and perhaps very, very useful. She knew she had to find out more.

Back in her own room, Jin frowned at her reflection. The dress was surprisingly flattering. She had never thought that a colour she disliked so much would work so well with her hair and her complexion. If she had brown eyes, instead of green, she would have looked very Fire Nation in this outfit. Very carefully, she took her old dress and folded it, then tucked it into her bag amongst her travelling things. She hoped the servants with the anti-green opinions would not find it. Jin wondered if she had the power to order them not to throw it out. She wondered if she had any power here at all. Sighing again, Jin pulled her hair into a ponytail. She was not going to give them the satisfaction of seeing her wearing it with a topknot as they probably expected. The ponytail made Jin smile for the first time since she had arrived at the palace. It was the same slightly crazy ponytail she had worn the time she and Zuko had gone out for dinner and to see the fountain. Unlike the dress, it made her feel like herself. Taking a breath, Jin stuck her head out of the door, looking for the bossy courtier who had provided the clothing.

"How do I go about arranging an audience with the Fire Lord?" She asked matter-of-factly. She was going to see him whether he wanted her to or not.


	9. Chapter 9: And So They Meet

Chapter 9: And So They Meet

Zuko sat on the throne, drumming his fingers nervously on the chair's smooth wooden arm. There was something to be said for this wall of fire. It hid him from prying eyes, making him appear to be always confident, always mysterious, always in charge. No one need ever know if he was uncertain, or nervous, or thought he might be making a bad decision. There was no way for anyone to tell, when the fire burned gloriously bright between him and the rest of the room. In the past he had often thought that the separation was unnecessary, but now he could see why generations of Fire Lords had maintained this tradition.

He watched as one of the pair of great doors at the far end of the room opened, and a figure entered. Zuko could tell she was female, even through the curtain of flames. He watched as she stood quietly for a long moment, apparently stunned by the room. Zuko had known this room all his life, and it always surprised him how people reacted when they saw it for the first time. Something about the big, dark open space, regularly spaced columns extending to a shadowy ceiling, and the curtain of fire, seemed to intimidate commoners and visitors. That was another advantage of the Fire Lord's throne room.

The young woman tentatively took a few steps forward. A ponytail, Zuko noted, and then smiled. It _was_ her! He stood, lowering some of the flames with a gesture, but suddenly stopped, and let the flames return to their full height. He sat down heavily on the throne. Jin was sure to be angry, after all.

"Zuko?" Jin asked uncertainly, "Is that you?"

She was sure it had to be him, though it was hard to tell with that wall of fire. It was amazing how warm the fire made the room, despite the room's immense size. Funny, the warmth was nice, but the room was far from cozy. She frowned and took a couple of steps closer to the fire, squinting with her effort to see through it.

"It _is_ you, right?" Jin asked again, sounding more uncertain than ever.

Zuko swallowed. He had missed her, but this was not going to be pretty. He did not stand up, but he did lower some of the flames, the ones directly in front of him. Jin blinked at the sudden gap in the wall of fire.

"Hello, Jin." Zuko said quietly.

**A Note to the Reader: **_Sorry about mistreating you with the short entry, but I will save the meat of the conversation for the next installment. I think things will be more effective that way._


	10. Chapter 10 Paete, non Dolet

Chapter 10: Paete, non Dolet

"It really is you," Jin said, sounding almost surprised. Tentatively, she stepped closer, feeling the heat from the fire reflect off her cheeks as it threw odd shadows across the walls. Jin looked at Zuko. In some ways he still seemed the same – he was wearing one of his trademark inscrutable expressions – but he also looked worldly and sophisticated. He was wearing robes that were loose, but somehow formal, and he sat on the throne as if he owned it – which Jin supposed he did.

"Yeah, it's me," Zuko said, then, smiling slightly, he added, "I'm a little surprised you came."

Had Zuko been honest, he might have mentioned that he was relieved Jin had come, that some small part of him had been utterly convinced that she would not. He might have admitted that she did, perhaps, have reason to be angry with him, even happy to be rid of him, especially after what she must have seen as a betrayal. The fact that she had been willing to come meant she didn't hate him, and though he was not about to let her see it, the fact that she did not hate him made him happy.

"Surprised?" Jin asked. Then she frowned.

He had told her to come. There was no reason for him to be surprised when she actually showed up. They were supposed to be married, after all, and even if he had lied to her about this whole Fire Lord thing, she did care for him. Zuko had known her long enough and intimately enough that he ought to know she cared. Unless, of course, he himself didn't. He always had seemed as if he cared, but if it was just a façade, well, then he could be excused for thinking she was displaying some sort of façade as well. She had always thought him somewhat guarded about his emotions, as if he was afraid he might be hurt, but perhaps she had been mistaken. Maybe he just didn't feel all that strongly. He certainly wasn't elaborating on his 'surprised' comment.

"It wasn't like you really gave me a choice," Jin said, "I was told I was ordered to come. And you send the Fire Nation army. And you're the Fire Lord, for crying out loud, and I live in an occupied area, and so it wasn't like I could say no!"

Zuko frowned, but fought not to show anything beyond that. He had missed her, he had asked her to come, and she was not glad to be here. She resented being here, in fact.

"I didn't make you come," He retorted angrily.

"You're the Fire Lord; how could I refuse?" Jin sighed.

"So go home then, if you're so sure you don't want to be here," Zuko's voice was calm, but he found he was gripping the armrest so firmly his fingers ached.

Jin looked up at him.

"I can't," she said, "I won't."

Zuko's grip on the armrest relaxed.

"I don't want to," Jin said, not looking at him, "I want to be here."

"Really?" He asked, doubtfully.

Jin nodded, her expression very serious.

"I have my reasons," she added. Then she crossed her arms, as if to protect herself from some danger even she could not identify.

She looked so lonely, standing there. Zuko uncertainly stood from his chair, taking a few steps towards her. To his surprise, Jin suddenly broke from her troubled stance, and rushed towards him, through the gap in the flames. In a moment, Jin had scrambled up onto the low platform and thrown her arms around him.

In his surprise Zuko lost control of the flames and they shot up to their accustomed height, bathing everything in a yellow glow and making the room just that much warmer as he awkwardly returned her embrace. He realized, to his shock, that despite her anger she might just still like him after all.

Jin leaned into him, happy simply that he hadn't pushed her away. If this was a façade, it was a good one. She had always believed he loved her, before.

"I don't really want to be here," Jin admitted, "But I want to be with you. After all, we are married."

Zuko's entire body stiffened, and he stepped backwards out of Jin's embrace.

"What?" She asked, confused.

"About that," he said, his voice hoarse, "Could you not mention it to anyone just yet?"

**A Note to the Reader: **_Yes, we're back to the Latin. _Paete, non dolet_ means "It doesn't hurt, Paetus". Apparently that sentence made up the dying words of an Ancient Roman woman called Arria. If you don't want to read a couple of depressing paragraphs about her sad end, stop now. Otherwise, I think it's sort of interesting, and the title doesn't make much sense if you don't know some background:_

_Arria was very in love with her husband, a man named Paetus. Unfortunately, Paetus somehow ended up at the wrong end of a failed conspiracy to kill the emperor. Of course, this being Ancient Rome, the only possible way to atone for such a crime, save face, and make everything right in the world again was for Paetus to commit suicide. Paetus agreed to do so – it was better to be allowed to kill yourself than to be executed, after all – but when it came time, he just couldn't make himself do it. He agonized over it for a while, but couldn't get up the courage to 'fall upon his sword,' as they say._

_Arria, watching him, could no longer bear his suffering, and snatched up his dagger. She then stabbed herself, and, as she bled to death, handed Paetus back the dagger, saying "_Paete, non dolet" –_ "Paetus, it doesn't hurt." Thus, Arria told an obvious lie to comfort someone she loved, and to encourage him to do something which, though difficult, she believed he had to do. _

_Frankly I think she was misguided, but it isn't her fault she was born an upper-class ancient Roman. Still, it is a sad story. I wish Arria and Paetus could have run off to some island where the emperor would never find them, and not had to worry about unpleasant deaths._


	11. Chapter 11: Elsewhere

Chapter 11: Elsewhere

Azula walked into the room. It was a small, dark dining hall, tucked into a corner of a palace sublevel. It was intended for the palace guard, and for such members of the military as might be working with them, temporarily. Azula was pleased to find it was nearly empty. Fortunately, the person she had been looking for was still there. This would be too easy, she thought, smiling to herself. This would much too easy. It might be almost too easy to be fun.

The young soldier couldn't believe his luck. Princess Azula was speaking to him, of all people! It was unusual for anyone except the rank-and-file soldiers to end up in this dining hall – even the officers usually avoided it – yet here the princess was, and through some miracle she had chosen to speak with him.

"Yes, your highness, I was with the group who just returned from the Earth Kingdom," he said in response to her questions. He was dazzled by her. She was so pretty, and so imperious and so very obviously royal. It was an honour just to be in the same room with someone like her, the young soldier thought.

Azula smiled to herself. This young man was open-hearted and more than a little naïve. She could use him. It only took moments to find out what she wanted to know.

First, as Azula had suspected, the young woman was definitely not a prisoner, but a guest. Secondly, also as Azula had surmised, the order to invite her – and fetch her back – had come from the Fire Lord himself. There was, however, something new, new and surprising and perhaps useful for her plans, if she handled it well. She almost missed it, too. She had asked all her questions, and had been about to leave the room. Fortunately for her, the young man was talkative, and eager to please.

"Wait, your highness, there's something else," he had said as Azula had moved to leave.

Azula had rolled her eyes, "Oh? Make it quick."

The young solider stammered slightly, and said, "Well, from what she said, she knows the Fire Lord well."

"How well?" Azula wanted to know.

"Really well," the young man said, looking down at his plate, "I even . . . well, your highness, the girl and the Fire Lord . . ." he had trailed off, looking around anxiously.

Azula slammed her hand down on the table. The soldier looked a little frightened. The princess was not as sweet as she seemed, he realized. Perhaps it wasn't wise to tell her anything – except he'd already opened his big mouth, hadn't he? So now he had to go on.

"Yes? What was going on?" she demanded, exasperated by the soldier's long pause.

The soldier sighed and looked around again. Confident that no one was close enough to overhear their conversation, he finally continued.

"Well, like I said, your highness, they're very close. I got the impression," the young man blushed slightly, "that they lived in the same house together. To be honest, if I didn't know better, I'd have said they were married."

"Married?" Azula laughed, "My brother isn't married."

"N-no, of course not, your highness," the soldier quickly agreed. After all, if the Fire Lord was married, it would have been mentioned somewhere in the flurry of official announcements that had come out at the time of his coronation. There had been not one word of marriage, or even betrothal. So the Fire Lord _couldn't_ be married, Princess Azula was right about that.

Azula had laughed again, and left the room, much to the young soldier's relief. It was, Azula, thought, a ridiculous idea. Her brother, married, and to a mere nobody from the Earth Kingdom? The idea was hilarious.

Still, Azula reflected, there was something to what the soldier had said. Her brother was obviously fond of the Earth Kingdom girl, for some unfathomable reason. And Zuko being fond of an Earth Kingdom girl was, well, interesting. It was deliciously juicy, but it wasn't the sort of relationship that Azula could allow to go anywhere. After all, in order to be the power behind the throne, Azula needed Zuko to be on it. And a Fire Lord with a consort from the Earth Kingdom would not be popular among the more conservative elements of the Fire Nation nobility. And the thought of a half-Earth-Kingdom child someday being heir to the Fire Nation was worse than laughable. It was, in Azula's opinion, borderline treasonous. It was definitely distasteful. Why what if the child was an earth bender and not a fire bender at all? Imagine a Fire Lord who couldn't control Fire! Why, the Fire Nation would be a laughingstock. This whole little relationship had to come to an end, though in the meantime, well, it was a fine way to control Zuko. A fine way indeed. Azula smiled to herself as she walked down the hall.


	12. Chapter 12: Again, it's Complicated

Chapter 12: Again, it's Complicated.

Jin stared at him.

"What?" She asked.

"Just don't mention it to anyone yet," Zuko repeated.

Jin stepped back, away from him. She was not sure what to say, or how to react. She stared at him stupidly.

"Look, it's not that difficult, you just have to stay quiet for a while," he explained, awkwardly.

Jin looked away, and said, "If you didn't want me here, why did you ask me to come?"

"I do want you here," he insisted, "It's just, it's . . . complicated," he offered, sounding defeated. She was going to jump on that statement, but it _was_ complicated, he thought defensively.

Jin glared at him, her green eyes flashing in the fire light. She contemplated yelling at him.

"Complicated? Complicated again? It's always complicated, isn't it?" she sighed, rather than yelling.

Zuko relaxed slightly. She wasn't happy, no, but she wasn't yelling at him either. He reached out a hand and placed it on her arm. She did not flinch or pull away. Instead, she looked up, into his eyes, as if searching for something.

"I'm sorry?" He offered tentatively, hoping to defuse her anger, so that he could explain things. She would understand once he had explained, he was sure.

Whatever it was that Jin was searching for in his eyes, she hadn't found it. She looked down, frowning.

"Yes, of course you're sorry," She said, "I'd be sorry too, if I were you."

"What does that mean?" He asked, suspicious.

"I get it. It was all a terrible mistake. You didn't expect to go home, and the decisions you made weren't the same as they would have been otherwise. You asked me to come here because you felt obligated. As a couple, we were a mistake. I should go home." She finished abruptly, her voice oddly dull and devoid of emotion.

The moment Zuko stared at her, trying to force his tongue to speak some sort of coherent response, was long enough for Jin to turn and start to walk away. He reached for her again, barely snagging her sleeve. She stopped and looked at him.

"Wait," he begged, "It isn't like that. I do want you here. I can explain everything."

Jin's expression was doubtful.

"Please, just listen?" He begged.

Jin thought about the fact that she had travelled long and far to be here, about the fact that she had liked and trusted him for most of the time she had known him, and about the fact that maybe, just maybe, he was telling the truth. He really was a jerk sometimes, but perhaps she should listen to him. If she didn't like what she was hearing, she could always leave, after all. Jin nodded, then sat down on the floor of the raised platform, drawing her knees up to her chest and locking her arms around them, as if for protection. Sitting like this the flames completely hid her from the rest of the room, making her feel safe. She suspected this conversation would require a sense of protection and safety.

Zuko felt foolish standing, almost talking down to her, so he knelt, then sat back on his heels, his hands resting on his knees.

"Jin, you're right. If I had known I would be allowed to return here, to take up my position as heir and later as Fire Lord, I wouldn't have married you when I did."

I knew it, she thought. It really was all a mistake. He doesn't want me here at all, and I was a fool to come. I was a fool to marry him at all. Jin looked down at her knees, embarrassed to feel tears beginning to well up in her eyes. She fought to blink them back, as Zuko continued speaking.

"I would have brought you here, instead."

Jin looked up for a moment, surprised.

"I like you," He explained, shrugging, "And I've been, well," his voice sounded strained, "I've been happy."

He scowled and looked down for a moment. Jin waited, lifting a hand for a moment to wipe an escaped tear off her cheek.

"Then we could have been married here, properly. Not that we weren't married properly, I mean. It's just, there would have been official witnesses. Government witnesses. That kind of thing is important for someone in my position."

Jin smiled slightly, sniffling though the tears were starting to dry up. If he went on like that she might leap up and throw her arms around him. He would have married her no matter what, that's what he was saying. Which meant that he loved her, and so, in spite of his lies and his being the Fire Lord and her own strange new position, everything would be just fine.

"I like you a lot, and I do need to be married," He continued, "I don't have an heir, after all."

Jin blinked, saying, "An heir?"

"I am Fire Lord, you know," Zuko said, sighing, "It's my responsibility to make sure my line continues, for the good of the country. And so I have to be married. And as you and I are already married . . ."

Jin frowned slightly. This conversation was not going where she had expected.

"It makes things easier?" she suggested.

"No, harder," he corrected, "Do you have any idea how bad this all looks?"

"How bad what looks?"

"I can't just waltz in here with a wife from the Earth Kingdom! Some of my officials would think that was practically treason! And you aren't even the daughter of anyone important, so I can't even argue that I was trying to make some sort of alliance!"

Jin felt her innards turn to ice despite the warmth of the room.

"So, I'm not good enough for you?" She retorted.

"Yes – wait, no! That isn't what I meant!" Zuko sounded frustrated. Jin just isn't understanding what I'm trying to say, he thought.

"Then what _did_ you mean, Zuko?" She asked coldly.

"I meant that I need to explain to my officials, to my advisors – to my country. I need to prepare them . . . give me a little while, alright?

"You're horrible," Jin said cruelly. She barely registered the expression on Zuko's face. He looked troubled and a little desperate and like he might throw up – a feeling that Jin shared – though Jin paid no attention to his emotions.

"You just insulted me. You insulted me and my country and my parents, for goodness' sake! My parents whom I haven't seen since your stupid country invaded mine! Now you're in charge of that country and nothing will change, and you don't even really like me! And after all that, you expect me to do as you say?!"

"Things will change. I intend to see to that. I'll put a stop to all this nonsense and end the war, you'll see. I haven't been Fire Lord for long, after all. And I do so like you! Why would I ask you here if I didn't?"

"I don't know! Some misplaced sense of obligation? Maybe because it's dishonourable to abandon a woman you called your wife, even in the Fire Nation? Or maybe you just think I'd be a good mother for your stupid heir. I don't know, but I don't like it!"

"It is not like that!" Zuko said defensively, only that wasn't completely true. He really did feel obligated to her, and it was dishonourable to mistreat your wife, at least, he believed so. And he did not simply think she would make a good mother, he was sure of it. And he knew how important a good mother was to a child. Still, Zuko wasn't lying, either. Those weren't the only reasons he wanted her here. He really did hope that this relationship would work. He had enjoyed being her husband. He had felt sure that she understood him, even without knowing so many things about him. And now he didn't really understand why she couldn't just trust him, and let him make everything alright in his own way and in his own time.

"Then what is it like?" Jin retorted.

Zuko looked down.

"I love you," he offered sheepishly.

Jin looked away, avoiding his gaze as he tried to meet hers. That was a rare statement, coming from him.

"Just give me a chance," Zuko suggested, "I'm really not a bad guy. I'll make this all work. I promise."

Jin looked at him doubtfully.

"How long?" She asked.

Zuko looked at Jin in confusion.

"How long until it's all explained?" Jin asked, "Until I can be your wife properly again? Until – " she paused, digesting the foreign concept before speaking – "until I am Lady of the Fire Nation?"

Zuko sighed in relief. "Soon," he offered, "Give me eight weeks? Twelve, at the most?"

He wanted three months at the outside, then. Jin nodded.

"I won't give you any more time than that," she said firmly.


	13. Chapter 13: The Fun Begins

Chapter 13: The Fun Begins.

Azula smiled to herself as she sat down beside her brother.

"Hello, Zuzu," She said, smiling as he grimaced.

I have such plans for him, Azula thought. Zuko was fond of that Earth Kingdom girl, that much was obvious. He had sent for her, after all, and it was interesting that her presence had been kept quite, if not a secret. If the girl had been some sort of ambassador, or liaison, or even a proper prisoner, that would have been public knowledge, and Azula would have been informed. The fact that Azula had not been informed of any such thing meant that the Earth Kingdom girl was something very different indeed. This was going to be such fun.

"What're you doing here, Azula?" Zuko asked, sounding grumpy.

"What, my only brother the Fire Lord isn't happy to see me? Pity," Azula enjoyed her brother's discomfort.

"You always seem to want something, Azula," Zuko pointed out, his voice weary, "So what is it this time?"

Azula shrugged, "Nothing much. I just thought you might want some useful advice."

"Advice? _Useful _advice? Since when did you ever give me useful advice?"

Azula shrugged again, "Aren't I allowed to help my brother, if I want to? You're always so distrustful, Zuko."

"Maybe because you've been known to lie, Azula."

Azula chose to ignore that comment. Instead, she said, "You know, Zuzu, you've been Fire Lord for weeks now, and you still haven't done a lot of important stuff."

Zuko looked at his sister suspiciously. Azula's tone might be sweet, and her words might be reasonable right now, but she was plotting something. Azula was always plotting something.

"What might that be?" He asked, his tone not entirely polite.

"Oh, plenty of things. Why haven't you renewed our attacks on the Earth Kingdom yet, hmm? They're going to start thinking they can take the occupied territories back, you know. And after that, what about our colonies? You really should crush them now when you have the chance."

"I already told you, I'm planning to put an end to this war."

Azula laughed, "But, Zuko, what better chance to end a war against the Earth Kingdom than by destroying it? It would be easy," she smiled darkly, then continued, "and fun."

For a moment Zuko stared at his sister. He wondered if she really believed that sending hundreds of men to their deaths would be fun. It really would take hundreds of deaths, even now, to utterly subdue the Earth Kingdom, and that was only the Fire Nation deaths. There would also be the enemy troops and Earth Kingdom civilians who would inevitably die in any such attempt. Zuko supposed he could accept the death of the enemy troops, but the civilians were another matter, and besides, he had a plan to avoid all that anyhow.

"I'm not destroying the Earth Kingdom," he said firmly.

"You're an idiot. And way to soft to be Fire Lord. I'd watch out, if I were you," Azula warned.

Zuko frowned, but only said, "So what other important things am I neglecting?"

Azula grinned to herself. Time for some of that fun she had promised herself.

"Well, you know, brother dear," she mocked, "You won't live forever."

"Is that a threat?" Zuko asked.

"A threat? I think not;" If I were threatening, he would know, "more of a reflection."

"A reflection?"

"Well, really, Zuko, who is going to be Fire Lord after you? I mean, I could do it, but somehow, I think you don't like that idea," and really, Azula thought, what is the point of actually being on the throne, when it is so easy to control everything of importance from off of it? "So you need someone to succeed you. I don't know who that could be, though. I'm sure you'll outlive Uncle Iroh. I guess I'll have to rule the Fire Nation after all. Well, unless you marry and have a child."

Zuko looked at Azula, wondering if someone, somehow, had overheard his conversation a few hours ago with Jin. There had been no one around though, he was sure of that, and he doubted Azula even knew Jin was in the palace, yet.

Azula noted Zuko's wary expression, and commented, "What, were you planning to marry, Zuzu?"

"No, not exactly," he scowled. It's pretty hard to get married if you already are, he reflected.

Azula sighed theatrically, "I thought as much. Mai will be very disappointed, you know."

"Mai will be?" Zuko asked, but then realised, of course she will be. She thinks that she and I . . . But of course, there's Jin. I can't tell Azula about Jin. Not yet, anyhow, until my more loyal advisors and officials have been won over. Azula's too dangerous to tell.

"Well, she is the natural choice, Zuko. Her father is one of your governors; she's clever; you seem to think she's pretty, and, for some reason I'll never understand, she likes you. Also, she listens to what I tell her to do, which pleases me greatly, whatever you might think of it."

"Mai's okay," Zuko said. He hoped his voice sounded nonchalant, but he feared that Azula could hear his inner turmoil.

"Good, "Azula said, grinning wickedly, "I'll make sure to invite her to supper, then."

Without waiting for a response, Azula stood and left the room. Zuko was left wondering what he was supposed to do about Jin. Jin obviously expected to have supper with him – they had always eaten together at home – and it would have been the perfect opportunity to start introducing her to some of his people. People she was going to have to impress, if everything was going to work out. But how could he manage to have Jin and Mai at the same supper, when he wasn't ready to reveal the nature of his relationship with Jin? This wasn't going to work out well.


	14. Chapter 14: Ab Ovo Ad Mala

Chapter 14: _Ab Ovo Ad Mala_

Uncle Iroh sighed, but said nothing. He could have told Zuko that allowing the servants to seat Mai beside him was a bad idea. He could have mentioned that seating Jin - who was still, the last Iroh checked, the boy's wife – at the far end of the table was an even worse idea. Still, Iroh kept his peace; the supper table was no place for an argument.

Jin sat near one end of the large table, her elbows resting on the dark polished wood. A dozen officials sat between her and her husband, and she did not look happy. Her expression combined disappointment and bewilderment. She had obviously taken some pains with her appearance, allowing the servants to provide her with yet another dress, and wearing her hair down. Iroh knew that she had gone to talk to Zuko, but it apparently did not have the effect Iroh would have hoped for. After all, there were no happy nuptial announcements being made – they weren't even sitting together. The officials looked confused by her presence at the Fire Lord's table, but knew better than to comment. Iroh knew, however, that there would be plenty of conversation out in the corridors after the meal.

Zuko, meanwhile, was seated between Mai and Azula. Azula was grinning like a Cheshire cat. Iroh assumed this meant Azula knew something, and was planning something else, something which would most likely prove unpleasant for her brother. Mai was just as obviously happy – quietly happy, but happy nonetheless. Mai's expression was tranquil, and she spoke softly with Zuko about pleasant things – the flowers that had bloomed in the palace courtyard in the spring, the way a few lazy turtleducks stayed in the pond all winter, the games they had played as children. It would have been a pleasant, almost romantic scene, if it were not for the look on Zuko's face. Iroh's nephew was frowning now, and had been throughout the meal. To be honest, it made Iroh feel a little better about the whole thing. The boy _should_ be uncomfortable. He had made an awful mess of things.

As the meal wore on, the Earth Kingdom girl seemed to grow more dismayed. Zuko did not even seem to notice Jin existed, and Azula occasionally shot a cruelly amused glance in her direction. Iroh raised an eyebrow, but kept to himself. He would talk to the boy afterwards, he told himself, and let Azula worry about herself. He doubted Azula would listen to him, anyway. Meanwhile Jin dropped her chopsticks, and went to fish around for them under the table before the servants brought her another set. Zuko noticed this and blushed slightly. How ever was he going to get this girl up to par, when she couldn't even eat supper properly?

Both Jin and Mai seemed to notice Zuko's reaction. Jin blushed furiously, realizing that somehow she had embarrassed him. Mai, however, looked confused. She glanced between Zuko and Jin and back again several times. Azula gave a small triumphant smile, and Mai's expression hardened. It seemed Mai had reached some unpleasant conclusion. Mai tucked her arm into Zuko's, causing him to look into her eyes, and causing Jin to make a little choking sound. Iroh was afraid things might turn into an open argument, but the moment passed. Zuko shrugged Mai's arm off his own, and the conversation turned to politics. Nonetheless, Jin was ignored, and as the night wore on, her expression became more and more despondent.

**A Note to the Reader:**Ab Ovo Ad Mala_ means "from eggs to apples" – eggs being a common appetizer (at least, among the ancient Romans, whose saying it is) and fruit being a typical way to end a meal. Hence, 'from start to finish', but with a mealtime twist._


	15. Chapter 15: Some Advice

Chapter 15: Some Advice 

Iroh had fully intended to speak privately with his nephew immediately after the meal. It was not, however, a task he relished, and he was quite happy, when he realized that Mai was speaking to Zuko about something in an angry monotone, to keep walking down the hall as if ignoring Zuko had been his plan all along. Of course he would talk with the boy when the boy was alone, but right now, he wasn't.

Iroh seriously considered taking a warm bath followed by a nap, but even he knew that was slightly irresponsible. He had to do something about the whole situation, even if he couldn't talk to Zuko just yet. Perhaps he could talk to Jin, offer her some support or comfort. He was curious to see how she was taking things.

Jin lay on the bed, glaring at the wall as if she could somehow bore through it with her eyes. When someone knocked at the door, she sighed and said, "What?" in tones that were perhaps not as polite as they should have been.

"Can I come in?" a hopeful, almost jolly voice had asked from beyond the door.

Jin sighed. What did that old fool want with her now? Then, rolling onto her back, she grimaced – my own thoughts are starting to sound like that stupid Zuko, she realized. 

"Did you hear me?" Iroh's pleasant voice floated through the door again. Jin considered blocking her ears with the pillows and ignoring him, but decided against it.

"Come in," she said, placing her hands behind her head and staring up at the ceiling.

Iroh had been afraid that the girl might be crying. Even he would be uncomfortable consoling a bawling girl. He was relieved to see that she was indignant and confused, rather than overwhelmed and sad. He sat carefully on the edge of the bed. Jin rolled over onto her side so her back was to the old man.

"So, my nephew has offended you, I see," he said thoughtfully.

Jin shrugged, "Not really."

"Oh? You must be a very accepting person, then," Iroh said calmly.

"What's that supposed to mean?" Jin asked, sitting up and looking at Iroh's back.

"I mean that you are letting him get away with too much. The situation is complex, I will grant you that, but things would be simpler if my nephew were not being so foolish."

"He and I talked. I trust him," Jin said, though she sounded uneasy.

"That is fine, so far as it goes. But if he were to acknowledge your presence publicly, rather than keeping quiet about everything, things would be better."

"I'm not sure how," Jin sighed, "It is strange that I'm here, it really is. I'm from the Earth Kingdom after all. I mean, come on, I didn't even enjoy the spicy food at supper! It made my stomach ache worse than it was before, I swear. I'm not like you Fire Nation people. Maybe this whole thing isn't so great an idea."

"It probably wasn't," Iroh agrees. Jin glares at his back as he continues, "But what is done is done. Neither of you wants to give the other up, I think, and so all this must be made public."

"Zuko said to wait. Three months, he said."

"So long?" Iroh asked, turning to look at Jin. She nodded.

Iroh sighed. "I think things need to happen sooner than that," he cautioned. Then he stood, patted her knee, and walked out.

Jin drew her knees up to her chest. She considered having a good cry, but decided against it. Instead she lay back on the bed. So things need to happen sooner? Fine, then they will, she decided.

**A Note to the Reader:**_I was considering doing this chapter and the next in reverse order but eh, I wrote this one first. It might have gone better the other way – we'll see once I've written that next chapter. My apologies to all of you on the ridiculous length of this story. My outline was only 7 chapters long, and we're currently round about the projected chapter 4. . . I'm sure you can do the math but I'm not sure I can trust the ratio to stay constant!_


	16. Chapter 16: Melancholia

Chapter 16: Melancholia

Meanwhile, in another part of the palace, a dark-haired girl looked at a young man, her expression inscrutable.

"I don't understand," the girl, Mai, said, "You used to like me. Or at least act like you did."

Zuko looked away.

"It isn't that I don't like you," he explained, "It's just . . ."

"You like someone else better, don't you?" She asked, a touch of harshness creeping into her voice.

"I didn't say that." He replied. And it wasn't exactly true that he liked Jin better; he just felt differently about the two girls. He still liked Mai as he always had. She was his friend. It was an odd friendship perhaps, but they were odd people, and it was a friendship nonetheless. Once he had thought such a friendship was a good basis for a relationship, maybe even a marriage. To be honest, he still felt such a relationship wasn't a bad idea. He had just chosen something else, something a little more magical, maybe, but not less real. And he had no desire to hurt Mai, though he felt he certainly would.

"Azula told me to watch out for that Earth Kingdom girl. I didn't believe her that you had even brought such a person here, but you did," Mai said in a monotone.

"It isn't what you think," Zuko said, because whatever she thought, he was sure it wasn't as serious or big as the truth was.

Mai did not reply, she just looked at him, frowning slightly.

Zuko turned his back to her. He was not going to look at her, as she looked like the miserable and grumpy person everyone always said she was. She wasn't really like that, he knew. She was reserved, yes, and didn't share her feelings easily, but she could be happy, and sweet, just like anyone else. He felt a little guilty about how he was treating Mai, but he knew he would feel worse still if he betrayed Jin.

"I'm sorry, Mai," he finally said, but by then Mai had turned and walked out of the room.

**A Note to the Reader**: _Yes, melancholia is a perfectly good English word. The whole idea of humours and related personality traits is so delightfully quaint, don't you think? I do think 'melancholy' suits Mai in general._

_Sorry about the long delay in updates, I have had a hard week. My apologies. Also, once again, apologies if I'm misspelled names anywhere (my nemesis, I tell you!)_


	17. Chapter 17: Suitability

Chapter 17: Suitability

Nothing ever goes as I want it to, Zuko thought, punching the wall angrily.

"And what did the poor wall ever do to you?" someone asked.

Zuko looked up in surprise. He had believed himself to be alone, now that Mai was gone, and had not noticed Iroh come into the room.

"I don't want to hear it, uncle," he said.

Iroh raised an eyebrow. "But you don't even know yet what I'm going to say."

For a moment the two men simply looked at each other, Zuko willing his uncle to leave, Iroh waiting for the boy to give in. Iroh's patience was rewarded. Zuko finally sighed, and gesturing, said, "Fine. What is it, uncle?"

Iroh came in and sat cross-legged on the floor, his back against the wall.

"You are acting like a fool," He told his nephew.

"I said I didn't want to hear it," Zuko retorted, but he sat down as well.

Iroh sighed loudly, muttering, "What I wouldn't give for a cup of tea . . . .

Zuko rolled his eyes as his uncle continued.

"You cannot keep secrets forever, you know. Your position is powerful, but precarious. You know that it is. You need to act decisively. Hiding things and sneaking around will not earn anyone's trust."

"She's from the Earth Kingdom"

"Yes. And that will make things hard, but not impossible. Trying to hide her, though, as if she embarrassed you, well, people will start to think that there really is something underhanded going on."

"There is! Azula's right; how could I have been so stupid as to marry her?"

Zuko ignored his uncle's frown as he went on.

"I don't mean I don't like her. I do; she's wonderful. But she isn't . . . she isn't suitable."

Iroh snorted.

"Let her learn about the Fire Nation and about court etiquette and she'll do just fine," he explained, "She is smart and kind, and she likes you and understands you. If that isn't suitable, what is?"

Zuko stared at his uncle, surprised. "But what if we have a child, and the child can't – "

His uncle cut him off, "It would be a pity, yes. But it is a bridge you may never have to cross."

"Look, do you have any more advice for me? Or are you done telling me I'm doing everything wrong?"

"Well, there is the whole problem with the war. I thought you were going to put a stop to it? Formally make peace with the Avatar?"

"I will!"

"That is another thing you should work on then, perhaps."

Zuko frowned as his uncle walked out. First Mai, and now Uncle Iroh. For once, he wished he could be the person who ended the conversation by ducking out.


	18. Chapter 18: Arrivals LongExpected

Chapter 18: Arrivals Long-Expected

Jin leaned far over the railing trying to get a better view of what was going on below. To be honest, she had expected something bigger, something fancier. After all, it wasn't every day that any country, but especially the Fire Nation, welcomed a group of former enemies as honoured guests. It was also possible that this interesting new development might have implications for her own life. Jin looked down at the shockingly short procession of officials, then grinned as an extremely large, grey animal lumbered into view. Jin was slightly disappointed that the bison was walking, instead of flying.

Jin watched the bison for a while, transfixed by the grace of this animal, so large and long-thought-extinct. The bison, though, was ushered down a side path, where the building were not so close together, and Jin turned her attention to the people several floors below. That really was the Avatar, there. He was taller and a little older than he had appeared in the wanted posters Jin had seen long ago, but that was no surprise. It had been several years since those posters had all appeared, back near the beginning of everything. The Avatar's companions looked a little older than their posters too, but none of them had grown or changed as much as the Avatar.

Jin looked curiously at the Avatar's companions. Like everyone, she had heard a lot about them, most of it rumours. Jin knew that the Avatar was the last of the Air Nomads, and was accompanied by a brother and sister from the Water Tribe, and by a girl who was a famous Earth Bender. Jin had never really known anyone from the Water Tribe. She wondered if she would get a chance to meet them, or anyone of the Avatar's party. She was curious, too about the Earth bender – Jin had been gone from the Earth Kingdom for nearly a month herself, now, and she missed being home.

Still watching the small procession, Jin sighed to herself. It was hard to be away from home, yes, but it was worse because she wasn't sure of her position here. Privately, she and Zuko would sit in the gardens and talk, or argue about if it was possible to beat Uncle Iroh in Pai Sho, or even, occasionally take a meal together; publicly, it was as if she didn't exist. Maybe she should go back home, back to Ba Sing Sei, and pick up her life where she had left off. After all, there were rumours that the university would reopen shortly. Jin could go back to being who she had expected to be, rather than whoever she was now. At least, that is what Jin told herself, but even she knew she couldn't go back to being that person. That person didn't exist any more. Besides, there were other things to worry about, important things that were wonderful and terrible at the same time.

The officials in the procession had reached the main gates by now, and were turning off to either side, flanking the Avatar and his friends. As they reached the gate, Jin noticed the figure standing straight and tall before them. It was Zuko, of course, welcoming his 'honoured guests'. Jin was impressed to see him bow politely, and welcome them with a smile.

If only he had done that for me, she thought. Not a ceremony, even a little one, like this one was, but a greeting with a smile. She watched as he turned and the guests were led into the main part of the palace. Jin knew that most Fire Lords would have presented their wives to such guests. Apparently her own personal Fire Lord felt differently. She still didn't know what he thought about her, deep down. He had asked her here, and kept her around, but he didn't publicly acknowledge her. Still, he had asked her for time, and she had promised to allow him that time. Jin wondered if that had been a wise decision, especially with certain developments, which, wonderful though they might be, were also frightening, and which she wasn't prepared to admit even to herself, just yet.

**A Note to the Reader:** _And so the main cast makes an appearance, and in a chapter with yet _more_ of that 'hit you over the head' type foreshadowing._


	19. Chapter 19: Two Visitors

Chapter 19: Two Visitors

"I don't know," Katara said, "It isn't like they said we were allowed in this wing."

"Oh, stop being a goody-goody scaredy cat," Toph retorted, rolling her eyes, "You're the one who wanted to see if we could find her."

"I am not!" Katara insisted, following Toph down the hallway, "You were going on about how you wanted to hang out with Earth Benders again!"

Meanwhile Jin was completely unaware of the good-natured teasing that was happening not thirty seconds from her door. She was lying on the bed staring at the ceiling, trying to come to some sort of conclusion on her life.

"I really ought to tell him," she muttered to herself, rolling onto her belly.

"Tell who what?" a cheerful voice asked as the door opened.

Jin sat up quickly, staring at the young woman in the doorway. The girl had short dark hair and was dressed in familiar Earth Kingdom green.

"Toph," The girl announced, introducing herself, "And this is Katara."

A taller girl dressed in blue pushed her way into the doorframe and smiled.

Jin managed to scramble to her feet.

"Hi," she said, trying to sound just as cheerful as her visitors, who stepped into the room.

"What a pretty room," Katara said, smiling as she looked around.

Toph sat on the bed with a bounce. "Cushy," she commented.

"Yeah, the room's decent," Jin agreed. She pulled a chair over from against the wall and sat on that, while Katara perched on the end of the bed, far from Toph who was at the middle. Toph straightened her legs out and wiggled her toes in contentment.

"I've never met anyone from the Water Tribe before," Jin said, smiling curiously at Katara. Katara seemed friendly, and Jin had to admit she liked the blue clothes. And the Water Tribe had always been allied with the Earth Kingdom, well, long enough to feel like always, anyhow. And Jin was excited to meet Toph and Katara anyhow – after all, they were sort of famous.

"Really?" Katara asked, and was about to go on, to tell Jin about the South Pole and Water Tribe customs, when Toph interrupted.

"And we've never met anyone who hides out in the Fire Lord's Palace before. Well, except Zuko, but being Fire Lord now, he doesn't count."

"I'm not hiding out here," Jin rolled her eyes.

"No? Then how come no one will tell us anything about you?" Toph asked.

Katara added, "Everything about you does seem secretive."

Jin sighed. She wasn't really a secretive person. If anything, she had the opposite problem, being too open, blurting out things she should keep to herself. This whole situation was so strange, she felt hardly herself.

"It's complicated," she finally said, then nearly laughed. "I sound like Zuko."

"You must know him well," Katara commented, thoughtful.

Jin nodded. "Very well," she explained.

Katara raised an eyebrow. Toph looked curious.

"It's a long story," Jin began, "I used to live in Ba Sing Sei . . ."


End file.
